The Top 5 Rocky Movies
Widely Missing the Cut: Rocky V
5. Rocky IV – When I was 13 years old, I watched a scratchy VHS tape of Rocky IV every single day. Actually, I watched the part where James Brown sings Living in America and then fast forwarded to when Rocky gets to Russia to start training. And you know, the movie works that way. The plot is ridiculous, Paulie has turned into an annoying buffoon by this point in the series and Adrian is a complete succubus during every scene she’s in. But the training scenes were legitimately cool, if a little confusing (why did Rocky scale a 15,000 mountain as part of his boxing training?). And Dolph Lundgren makes a pretty kickass villain. “I win for me! FOR ME!”
4. Rocky II – This movie suffers from the same problem as Rocky 4: the middle half of the movie is excruciatingly boring to sit through. An hour about how much of a loser Rocky is? He can’t read? He doesn’t know what a savings account is? But, the training scenes are as good, if not better, than the first movie and this time we get to watch him run up the steps of the Philadelphia Museum of Art with 100,000 kids following him. Plus, seeing Rocky win the title from Apollo is probably THE MOMENT among all the Rocky movies.
3. Rocky III – I love everything about the third Rocky. Rocky is a paper champ, he’s lost the “Eye of the Tiger,” he’s all of a sudden a huge, ripped bodybuilder, Hulk Hogan makes an appearance as Thunderlips, Apollo is now on Rocky’s side, Mick dies halfway through the movie, and Mr. T is a tour-de-force of a villain. T has arguably my 5 favorite quotes in the series, including:
The training scenes are decent, although they dwell on Rocky’s lack of the “Eye” a little too long. The training montage does lead to a great climax where Rocky and Apollo, wearing the shortest of short-shorts, give each other a giant man-hug while frolicking around in slow motion in the water. Stick that scene in a time capsule and call it the 80’s. While not as good as the Creed/Rocky fights, the fight at the end of the movie is entertaining as somehow Rocky survives 1,000 blows to the head from Clubber Lang.
2. Rocky Balboa – There isn’t much wrong with this movie. Adrian is dead. Rocky at least owns his own restaurant, so he’s not a complete loser like in the second movie. Stallone is scary huge in this movie, which kind of works because he’s still a boxer, except that he looked like some kind of mutant Stallone. The training scenes were awesome, as usual, and the ending to the movie was perfect - encapsulating exactly why people like to root for Rocky whether he wins or loses. The movie deals with some legitimate issues about getting older, loss, and moving on with your life. But for the love of god, let this be the last Rocky movie ever.
1. Rocky – The original is still the best. The movie is really showing its age after 30 years, but it is still enjoyable watch. A no-time, down on his luck Philadelphia boxer who gets a shot at the world title? And he comes within a whisker of winning after no one gives him a chance? The movie also introduced us to what would become a Rocky staple – the training montage.
5. Rocky IV – When I was 13 years old, I watched a scratchy VHS tape of Rocky IV every single day. Actually, I watched the part where James Brown sings Living in America and then fast forwarded to when Rocky gets to Russia to start training. And you know, the movie works that way. The plot is ridiculous, Paulie has turned into an annoying buffoon by this point in the series and Adrian is a complete succubus during every scene she’s in. But the training scenes were legitimately cool, if a little confusing (why did Rocky scale a 15,000 mountain as part of his boxing training?). And Dolph Lundgren makes a pretty kickass villain. “I win for me! FOR ME!”
4. Rocky II – This movie suffers from the same problem as Rocky 4: the middle half of the movie is excruciatingly boring to sit through. An hour about how much of a loser Rocky is? He can’t read? He doesn’t know what a savings account is? But, the training scenes are as good, if not better, than the first movie and this time we get to watch him run up the steps of the Philadelphia Museum of Art with 100,000 kids following him. Plus, seeing Rocky win the title from Apollo is probably THE MOMENT among all the Rocky movies.
3. Rocky III – I love everything about the third Rocky. Rocky is a paper champ, he’s lost the “Eye of the Tiger,” he’s all of a sudden a huge, ripped bodybuilder, Hulk Hogan makes an appearance as Thunderlips, Apollo is now on Rocky’s side, Mick dies halfway through the movie, and Mr. T is a tour-de-force of a villain. T has arguably my 5 favorite quotes in the series, including:
Interviewer: Do you hate Rocky?And...
Clubber Lang: No, I don't hate Balboa. I pity the fool, and I will destroy any man who tries to take what I got!
Interviewer: What's your prediction for the fight?
Clubber Lang: My prediction?
Interviewer: Yes, your prediction.
Clubber Lang: Pain!
The training scenes are decent, although they dwell on Rocky’s lack of the “Eye” a little too long. The training montage does lead to a great climax where Rocky and Apollo, wearing the shortest of short-shorts, give each other a giant man-hug while frolicking around in slow motion in the water. Stick that scene in a time capsule and call it the 80’s. While not as good as the Creed/Rocky fights, the fight at the end of the movie is entertaining as somehow Rocky survives 1,000 blows to the head from Clubber Lang.
2. Rocky Balboa – There isn’t much wrong with this movie. Adrian is dead. Rocky at least owns his own restaurant, so he’s not a complete loser like in the second movie. Stallone is scary huge in this movie, which kind of works because he’s still a boxer, except that he looked like some kind of mutant Stallone. The training scenes were awesome, as usual, and the ending to the movie was perfect - encapsulating exactly why people like to root for Rocky whether he wins or loses. The movie deals with some legitimate issues about getting older, loss, and moving on with your life. But for the love of god, let this be the last Rocky movie ever.
1. Rocky – The original is still the best. The movie is really showing its age after 30 years, but it is still enjoyable watch. A no-time, down on his luck Philadelphia boxer who gets a shot at the world title? And he comes within a whisker of winning after no one gives him a chance? The movie also introduced us to what would become a Rocky staple – the training montage.
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